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rav3n
Peer Support Worker

Re: My Mosaic

that makes perfect sense @Bow knowing she was still around even if she wasn't your current SW would've been comforting, i'm so sorry to hear she's leaving. that feeling of losing that bit of comfort/familiarity sucks, but i'm really glad she was there for you when you needed her. 💗
are you thinking of chatting to her one last time tomorrow?

Bow
Senior Contributor

Re: My Mosaic

That was the word @rav3n …. it was a comfort knowing she was there and was accessible if I needed her. 

id like to go see her one last time, but I know I will cry. And I don’t want that. Don’t wanna feel stupid. 

rav3n
Peer Support Worker

Re: My Mosaic

@Bow aww honestly, i'd cry too if i was in your shoes. she means a lot to you, and it's totally okay if you do cry - doesn't make you seem stupid at all, just shows you care heaps 💙

Bow
Senior Contributor

Re: My Mosaic

And why do they never give me time to prepare @rav3n ???? It’s like by the way this is happening TOMORROW!!  Why??? Do they just have zero understanding that people need time to prepare/come to terms with things. 

rav3n
Peer Support Worker

Re: My Mosaic

so fair to be frustrated @Bow i know this has happened many times before as well. you absolutely deserved a better notice, how are you holding up? is there anything that can help you process this better?

 

i'm also mindful that i'll have to head off soon, but please do reach out and lean on the community. 💗

Bow
Senior Contributor

Re: My Mosaic

 

Content/trigger warning

I’m not really doing ok @rav3n  (I know your probably gone now though) I am so on edge and everyone and everything is irritating me.  Have zero tolerance. 

I’d really like to just disappear. I don’t wanna be here, don’t wanna be around people. 

 

Got so many other things going on too. My gp called today. I couldn’t take the call cause I was driving so she called my mum (!!!!!!) she was just calling to do a ‘welfare check’ apparently cause I haven’t been there in 3 mths. So of course mum is now worried about why. Fu€£!#%¥

Re: My Mosaic

Hello @Bow, I am here. 💛

Gah, this sounds so overwhelming, I would be dysregulated and frustrated too!! I can hear you are feeling like your confidentiality was breached, is that right? 

Also, how we can let this anger you're feeling have a healthy expression? Does anything come to mind? 

Re: My Mosaic

Sitting with you @Bow 

Bow
Senior Contributor

Re: My Mosaic

Yeah not many respect my confidentiality @AuntGlow lots go over me and speak with my mum.  Geesh I missed one call and she didn’t even leave a message. 

I don’t even know 

 

feeling even worse now. Very dysregulated  now and my heart is racing. Can feel the tension everywhere in the house wanna go go disappear 

Re: My Mosaic

It's totally understandable that you wouldn't feel okay about this. I am glad to hear they care about you and want to make sure you are safe though (we always want that for you too! 🩷), but again, I can see why this has been so activating for you. @Bow 

I know things are rather intense for you right now... so what do you need most in order to feel more regulated at the moment?