Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[PeppiPatty]

How are you @Shaz51

[Shaz51]

Hi      Artaud , Thank you for your support and how are you ??

[Appleblossom]

Hi @Shaz51

Its difficult adjusting to health setbacks.  Have the visits with professionals been helpful in making decisions about work and level of involvement in community?

It took a long time for me to get my head around my physical reality and adjust my expectations of how much I took on each day.

[Shaz51]

Hi Appleblossom

RE:

It took a long time for me to get my head around my physical reality and adjust my expectations of how much I took on each day.

You have hit the nail on the head , it is so true -- what did you do to ???

[Shaz51]

RE:

It took a long time for me to get my head around my physical reality and adjust my expectations of how much I took on each day.

You have hit the nail on the head , it is so true -- what did you do to ???

[Appleblossom]

When I settled in new house 13 years ago I quickly developed a little business ... and tried to be disciplined about every day's activities ... I did unpaid and paid word and exercise etc  ... I was used to working hard ... but kept having over-use type injuries flaring up... neck ... wrists (piano)  back .. with varying levels of immediate pain and prevented me keeping at the pace I was going ...  I worked hard on technique issues on the piano  and reduced my practise ... physios and osteos were more helpful for me that chiros and doctors at that time ...

I also had the emotional issues of the deaths and divorce and the most pressing was the "loss" of my biological daughter ...

but gradually over time I keep coming back to the positives in my life ... now when I look back ... it has been lots of trial and error ... and I dont "fo rce" myself as I used to ...

the forum guidelines ... dont allow the use of the word "for ce" but it is a word I need to use to describe a lot of things in my life

Hope things are going steadily @Shaz51

[Shaz51]

hi Appleblossom , thank you for your message, we were doing ok at the start, we have said no to new jobs, but i can feel that we are getting where we were before, my husband has had no meetings for 6 weeks now until yesterday he mental health has found we have not seen someone for a while , so we see a new person tomorrow .

my husband finds he has to be busy but i can see the same cycle happening again, and not sure what to do ???

[Appleblossom]

Balancing the right level of busyness ... is ongoing for me ... I take days out now if I have had to go into town a bit ... I cannot keep up with those who commute all over the place ... but we all have different things to offer.

Dont cycles often show up in our emotional lives?

For me the hope is that we dont repeat our mistakes too much but that the cycles become a bit more like spirals ... things return in a similar way .. but slightly different.

Anyway I hope you both manage to keep things burbling along.

[Shaz51]

hi,     It has happen , i knew it would happen, my husband said this afternoon -- give up the business or cut back ! now  -- SO WHAT NOW !!! WHAT DO I DO !! my husband health is at risk

[CherryBomb]

Hi @Shaz51,

Sounds like a stressful and decision to make. I've only quickly read over your posts, so please correct me if I'm not following. 

Your husband and you have both been working on what level of work he do (while owning your business) to manage his mental health - is that right?

What are your thoughts about cutting back or giving up the business? 

CB

[Shaz51]

hi CherryBomb                     yes we have a small mowing and domestic house cleaning business where we also do gardening and other jobs , I myse ilf think it is a good idea to cut back , my husband is getting treatment and he also seeing a new mental health person today .

we are going to take time off over christmas which will be good , i have a few ideas but my husband changes his mind all the time , So today i said we are only working half a day then to relax for the afternoon

Thank you for your support , i love it